Lifestyle

My Journey to Self Love & Acceptance Came With 20 Lbs

Life. Depression. Anxiety.

All of it contributes to my 20 lb weight gain.

I have to be honest, I have (had?… probably have) no idea how to get rid of 20 lbs of excess weight. I was an athlete for the greater part of my life & with a naturally athletic build, staying fit – or at least looking the part – has never been hard for me. I’ve never had to “try”.

So when I finally got two feet back on solid ground, I half expected the weight to just go away on its own.

The depression was gone. I now understood myself better. But the habits of the last few dark years remained. So my weight stayed the same.

Initially I reached out to my social media networks. So many individuals I know have talked about their respective journeys to losing weight, I thought for sure if there were concrete answers that’s where they would be.

Now. I know you’re going to laugh at this, but stay with me.

So many people started by telling me I would have to give up wine in order to lose the 20 lbs.

If you know me, you KNOW that’s a hard no.

I’m just not going to do it.

I sat there with my thoughts for sometime & began to wonder if maybe I was just being stubborn. Maybe everybody was right? Maybe it was wine that was the culprit.

I rolled all these thoughts & ideas around in my head for a month or so – while drinking wine of course.

And I’ve come to a conclusion.

No.

That’s still my answer.

For one very basic reason… that’s not sustainable. I refuse to do anything that isn’t a lifestyle improvement I can live with for the rest of my life.

And well? That’s simply not it.

Giving up wine would be a punishment. I’m not trying to send my brain or my body the signal that it deserves to be punished!

Wine at the end of my day – while I’m reading a book or while I’m dancing in the kitchen as I cook – is like spending time with a friend from outside the walls of my day-to-day life.

Wine takes me places & warms me up to expand my horizons – including my sense of smell & palate.

I wouldn’t know any of what I know about France, the history of grapes, or terroir without wine in my life.

I will literally never run out of things to learn when it comes to wine.

Why on Earth would I take that away from myself?

How is THAT even healthy?

Well. It’s not.

I realized right then and there, that in order to reach the “ideal” version of Hannah I was going to have to start somewhere else.

So I started with love and acceptance.

I began looking at my body in the mirror every morning and finding something to compliment.

I began saying to myself “Girl. You DO look GOOD” every time I passed the mirror & considered being negative.

I started working out because it made my body feel good.

I started getting in my steps because I sleep better when I do.

I now ask myself – before eating – who I’m eating for – my emotions or my body?

I now tell my body it deserves to be loved and taken care of.

I thank a different part of my body every morning.

I thank myself for trying harder today than I did yesterday.

Will losing the 20 lbs take longer doing it this way?

I mean, obviously.

But then again, I’m not exactly doing this for the 20 lbs.

I’m doing this for me.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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I love this scale because it connects to my phone & give me a bunch of stats – including my body fat percentage! Check it out yourself

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