Sanwhich, Chips & a Water
I’m going to sum up what most people get wrong about me (and honestly, each other period) and it’s what we see versus what we know.
Here is my lunch. That I just looked at the clock, I’m eating at 9:44am on a Thursday.
Except to me it isn’t lunch. Lunch is a word. A word, according to Webster, is a usually light meal. We could stop there & it’s lunch.
To go any further, I ate this at the “wrong” time of the day.
Except about 2 weeks ago as I was working through some particularly hard tailends of some healed-ing trauma (look if that man over there can make up words, so can I - at least mine make sense and I can spell).
Anyway, I sat down to eat a ham & cheese sandwich and chips for lunch - because my son is home from college so the ingredients were in my home, and I was looking for the reminder comfort once existed in my life (y’all know it’s hard out here).
I was sitting there playing a lil game on my phone, making sure the farmers were getting their orders taken care of - eating my sandwich and chips. And so many memories came floating by with every bite and I found it. I found the comfort I was seeking. And it wasn’t hard.
The hard part was giving myself permission to do something that others would see as basic. And *gasp* silly.
I even told one of my best friends about my lil moment. I said, I really realized if I like this combination of food & it gives me endorphins and joy and reminds me of the good, comfort spots in my life WHY NOT GIVE THAT TO MYSELF AS AN ADULT.
*You also don’t know that my son & I have had a tradition of me dragging him to see Christmas lights over the holidays, and this year we went to eat afterwards and I asked him what his comfort food was and he said ham & cheese sandwiches. Which absolutely melted my heart and reminded me that underneath the things life throws at is, the really big & meaningful things still usually hang out around the simplicity of things like a ham sandwich.
So for now (because groceries are asking the same prices as rent right now) I’m working with what’s in my home that coincides with all people in the house. From there, I’m going to let myself experiment with what my favorite ingredients make an ideal sandwich and chip combination. Including chip varieties. And don’t get me started on adding soup on the side!!
Okay. So I tell you that story, right?!
And I show you my throwback Facebook lunch photo, right?!
*pause breaks for eating said sandwich & chips account for here
*add drinks of water
I’m making my sandwich today.
Back to… 9:53am.
And I’m like
I’m going to sum up what most people get wrong about me (and honestly, each other period) is what we see versus what we know.
You see a turkey sandwich and two kinds of chips.
I wanted the turkey slices to directly interact with the spicy brown mustard I had spread on one slice of bread.
And I wanted the colby jack to directly interact with the mayo, while the cheese and lettuce hung out together.
I have two types of chips because I like them.
And that’s the only reason.
And they are full handfuls, and I will go back in if I don’t have enough curled over, crunchy ones.
They are full and enough of my favorites as a nod to my teenage self.
Who needed the simplest forms of love.
And absolutely loved her chips down.
Oh. And the water.
Generally, I hide this part of me.
But who can even care about that anymore?!
You see water.
I chose this glass because the water bottle I have been using for the last few days accompanied me through some pretty intense shadow work & I now felt myself in transition of shedding the pieces that were not meant to be carried this far.
So I needed to use a new water cup, and it needed to be a cup (as opposed to a different water bottle) because to put a lid on it would create a closed-off energy I wasn’t in need of in this moment.
So a cup makes things temporary and transitional - that’s the energy I aligned with.
I chose purple, because I’m always thinking of the life I’m intentionally building.
Purple is such a color of pride in my life.
And one of the first times I ever felt beautiful in my life was when I was 18 years old and I was wearing the color lavender.
*nods to teen me*
The ice cubes are extra steps I give to myself to make round and adorable.
Why?
Because I really like endorphins.
And what an absolutely easy way to make sure I always at least have some stockpiled. Ya know?!
That’s it.
I need to go find something sweet now.
Love y’all.
I see you sandwich & chip combo lovers out there.
Ps. Love yourself enough to reprogram bananas to be a sweet treat - sometimes. And definitely keep chocolate in the house for the other times. And something gummy & sour.